Rooms are darkening as I am dreaming
Another version of her shadow speaking
This place now a familiar form to me
I stand in a room that grows blinding
Closing in around me I know this feeling
That something is here with me again
I am being cornered by this thing
I am afraid, so deeply moved, yet
I am forced to wake from here
I am becoming nostalgic for a being
That I cannot name in my daily life
So glad to be hosting my own websites these days and no I am not hosting using the Linux Apache path that everyone seems to flout as being the holy grail of hosting solutions. I happen to find both windows and Linux solutions have their own particular uses and as I have learnt over the years – if it works, use it. What ever makes your work flow easier and more productive, go with it.
I enjoy the challenge and the technical aspects of running my own servers and I am learning more everyday as I run and manage them on a daily basis. However, I don’t want to do this generic cookie cut hosting business that follows in the footsteps of every other hosting provider out there. That would be boring right? I am developing something unique for people to use, perhaps my ideas will change over time as I progress but I am happy to be malleable with my goals and direction for hosting.
Funny. Not wanting to be generic in that approach yet I am using a child theme of twenty fourteen for my own personal website. I have not yet found a theme that jibes well with me. The hunt for a worthy theme continues!
Crushed under the weight of a lucid schism, the social order seeping under my skin, a virus like mind, itching with insidious sin
His pose is held like a nightmare in psychosis, her poise and grace holds him still. In the embrace of her safety, the deep storm within him begins churning like a river, with fire sparks and dangerous gaps pushed through. Spitting, hissing, breathing in a boiling irritated mood.
Moving despite the obvious flawed gait, disposed deference, incomplete hidden faces. Dreams decay, denied, solidification bound to state. An aggravating array of beliefs eating at surface barriers. Boiling under skin, an itching growing hate.
Insects all over this male appearance, predetermined, called socially gay. Anguishing, dissembling, disillusioned. Fighting to find a way, seeking to fit in this sick hierarchy, playing, emitting the same song, no longer do I relate.
Like from out of a dream you spiralled into my reality
Crashing against the walls inside my reason cage
You brought my mind down to the softest core
Held me safe when I did not know how to talk
While you were looking away, colours coalesced into small shapes. Secreted close within my space, black veiled lace. Covered under night skies dreaming again.
While you were looking away. The small shape burnt against my heart like a stone. Secreted close enough to turn away from me. The love I had come to know.
While you were looking away. I was in wonder with many thoughts churning within me. That you nailed my mind to the floor. With your words like light beacons daring to call me in from the storm.